— What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
— Well, then you must be, like, the Hulk.
Explanation:
Charlie broke up with Courtney, although they had a stormy relationship
Similar Quote:
Explanation:
About Jack, who fell in love with a ballroom dancing teacher.
The holy trinity of a Valentine's Day: sips, sonets and sodomy.
Explanation:
Alan brags to Charlie about the wonderful qualities of his new girlfriend, Charlie objects.
— Alan, the kid was asking about these women you've been going out with. Why he never meets them.
— Really? What did you tell him?
— I said it's probably because he's disgusting... I also told him that you love him, you don't want him to get attached to somebody and then be dissapointed if things don't work out.
— Good. Thank you.
— But how come I don't get to meet them?
— Because you're disgusting.
— Why are they fighting?
— They're not fighting. They're discussing.
— I'm a child of divorce, Dad. I know the difference.
— You know what, it doesn't matter if I look cool, we judge a person by what's inside them, not by what they wear.
— Lucky for you.
— Sure you don't want a drink?
— No. When I'm depressed, alcohol just makes me feel worse.
— Yeah, see, the trick is to drink past that. It's not a sprint, it's a marathon.
— That poor, clueless bastard.
— It's like watching a dog stick his face in a fan.
Explanation:
The Harper brothers, being engaged to their mother and Teddy, feel sorry for him - what kind of party he got.
— I was just wondering. What does it mean when someone starts crying uncontrollably after sex?
— Well, in my experience, it usually means the conjugal visit's over.
— I have to bring the garbage cans back in.
— Today wasn't garbage day.
— No, not here. At Judith's.
— At Judith's? Alan, your wife throw you out.
— Yeah, that doesn't mean she doesn't need me.
— Yeah, it kind of does.
— Look, we're still married, it's still my house, and she still counts on me to do a few chores. It's good. It leaves the door open for, you know, reconciliation.
— I see. So, how do you lift those garbage cans without a spine?
Explanation:
Judith is Alan's ex-wife