Ironic Quotes

— You are, without doubt, the worst pirate I've ever heard of.
— But you have heard of me.

Dobby never meant to kill. Dobby only meant to maim or seriously injure.

I'm not in love with you anymore than you are with me. Heaven help the man who ever really loves you.

— Put it away, son. It's not worth you getting beat again.
— You didn't beat me. You ignored the rules of engagement. In a fair fight, I'd kill you.
— Then that's not much incentive for me to fight fair, then, is it'?

— How long you reckon she’ll stay mad at me?
— Keep talking ‘bout that little ball of light touching your heart — she’ll come round.

— You've been called the da Vinci of our time. What do you say to that?
— Absolutely ridiculous. I don't paint.

— It’s the quality of one’s conviction that determines success, not the number of one’s followers.
— Who said that?
— Me.

— You’re amazing, you are.
— Always the tone of surprise.

— Where's Elizabeth?
— She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry Norrington, just like she promised. And you get to die for her, just like you promised. So we're all men of our word, really. Except for Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman.

Narrator: Tyler, you are by far the most interesting single-serving friend I've ever met. ... See, I have this thing: everything on a plane is single-serving...
Tyler Durden: Oh, I get it. It's very clever.
Narrator: Thank you.
Tyler Durden: How's that working out for you?
Narrator: What?
Tyler Durden: Being clever.
Narrator: ... Great.