Sex Quotes

— Please don't feel obliged to tell me that was amazing. John's expressed that in every possible variant available in English.
— I would have you right here, on the desk, until you begged for mercy twice.

Well, you know what they say. Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and can't get laid, huh?

— I have a surprise for you tonight!
— God, I hope it's sex! Or a pony! I'll bet it's sex'cause I don't see a pony.

— Look, I feel like I can give you a list of things that are sucky about being pregnant. For starters, I'm now horny as I've ever been and my husband is repulsed by me.
— Listen, if you really need it that badly, I will suck it up and shut my eyes so tight and then do you.
— Thank you for the sacrifice.
— It's because I love you.

— I sort of had a sex dream about you.
— Really?
— Yeah.
— Was I the girl?
— Yeah, you were the girl. Can you just do me a favour? Don't tell Carla about this. She'll just get all jealous and disgusted.
— But we haven't done anything for her to be disgusted by.
— Oh, yeah, we did.

I haven't had sex in four months. I should get a medal for that!

I don't wanna get all Dr Phil on you, but women have a hard time separating sex from emotions.