Rachel Green Quotes

Are you setting Ross up with someone? Does she have a wedding dress?

— Is that a hickey?
— Oh, no, I just... I fell down.
— On someone's lips?

— I had to turn down a job catering a funeral for 60 people.
— Oh, my God! What happened?
— Sixty guests.

— Janice said, "Hi. Do I look fat today?" And I looked at her...
— You looked at her? You never look. You just answer. It's like a reflex. "Do I look fat?" "No." "Is she prettier than I am?" "No." "Does size matter?"
— No.

— What else did he say? Does he wanna go out?
— Given that he's in love with you... he wouldn't mind getting a cup of coffee.

— Okay, listen. I'm sorry about last night. I really want to make it up to you.
— No. You know, there's no need to make it up... How?

— I've never seen so much crap!
— Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crap.

— It's just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
— I watched you get hypnotized in Atlantic City.
— That guy did not hypnotize me, okay?
— You always pull your pants down and play "Wipe Out" on your butt.

— Is there anything wrong with that?
— Yes!
— Why?
— I have my reasons.

— Hey, guys. I want to ask you something. I may get to speak at this paleontology convention. If I do, I'd love for you guys to come and hear me.
— I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work and/or are sick.
— It's in Barbados.
— But you come first.
— I'm there.

— I should get back to work.
— Otherwise someone might get what they ordered.

— I don't know, I kind of ran into him last night.
— Where?
— At his apartment.

— We haven't known each other for that long a time. And, um, there are three things that you should know about me. One, my friends are the most important thing in my life. Two, I never lie. And three, I make the best oatmeal-raisin cookies in the world.
— Okay. Thanks, Pheebs. Mm, my God. Why have I never tasted these before?
— Oh, I don't make them a lot... because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies.