Men in Black – Movie Quotes

This definitely rates a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-metre.

— It's okay, Laurel.
— How is it okay?
— I'm saying it's gonna be okay.

— Kay. Give the kid a weapon.
— Series 4 De-atomizer.
— Now, that's what I'm talking about.
— Noisy Cricket.
— Hey, Kay, no, no. Come on, man. You get a Series 4 De-atomizer, I get a little midget Cricket?
— Whoa, kid!
— Feel like I'm gonna break this damn thing.

— Doctor, uh... Whatever, come here.
— Dr. Whatever? Hey, you guys aren't really from the Department of Health, are you?

— Please, not green. Oh, damn. I don't suppose you know what kind of alien life form leaves a green spectral trail and craves sugar water, do you?
— Oh, wait, that was on Final Jeopardy! Last night. Damn, Alex said it was...
— Zed, we have a bug.
— So, what? We don't like bugs?
— Bugs thrive on carnage, tiger. They consume, infest, destroy, live off the death and destruction of other species.
— You were stung as a child, weren't you?
— No, listen, kid, imagine a giant cockroach with unlimited strength, a massive inferiority complex, and a real short temper is tear-assing around Manhattan Island in a brand-new Edgar suit. Does that sound like fun?
— What's the move?
— With the bug in town, we'll watch the morgues.

You know what the difference is between you and me? I make this look good.

— Observation, the heart of our endeavour. Meet the twins, Blblup and Bob. This map shows the location of every alien on Earth. Some are under constant surveillance. Everyone on those screens is an alien. In public, they're as normal as you are, but in private... You'll get the idea.
— Oh, man.
— Doesn't make any sense, right?
— Well, no, it makes perfect sense. In third grade, everyone said I was crazy, but I knew our teacher... had to be from Venus or something.
— Ms. Edelson. Jupiter, actually. Well, one of the moons.

— She looks over to her husband... then sets it down in her lap and says: «Honey, this one's eating my popcorn». Get it? This one's eating... Gotta go. Thanks for the egg rolls.
— Wait a minute. Who are you?
— See what I mean about tequila? You're very bright. But you need to lay off the sauce. I'll see you bright and early, 9:00. Be there... or be square.

— Some night, huh?
— Some night.
— They were gills, not eyelids. Gills. He was out of breath.
— Who are you?
— Did he say anything to you?
— He said the world was coming to an end.
— Did he say when?

— What's going on?
— Excellent question. The answer you're looking for lies right here.
— Who are you, really?
— Really? I am just a figment of your imagination. Damn, what a gullible breed. I'm serious. You're lucky to be alive after that blast.
— What blast?
— The underground gas main. You should exercise caution before firing... I'll tell you that now. Especially you. Have yourself checked out with EMS before you leave.

— That... That...
— Was not human. I know. You got some entrails on you.

— Must... To prevent... contest.
— Okay, what are you trying to say?
— To prevent...
— To prevent struggle?
— No. To prevent...
— War?
— War... the Galaxy... is on Orion's... Be... Be... What is word?
— Bed? Belt? Orion's belt? «To prevent war, the Galaxy is on Orion's belt». What the hell does that mean?

Hey, old guys. Do those still work?

— I see we have a question.
— I'm sorry, maybe you already answered this but... why are we here?
— Son.
— Lieutenant Jensen. West Point graduate with honours. We're here because you want the best of the best of the best, sir!

— We'll check the hot sheets.
— «Pope a father!» These are the hot sheets?
— Best investigative reporting on the planet. Go ahead, read «The New York Times» if you want to. They get lucky sometimes.
— Cannot believe you're looking for tips in the supermarket tabloids?!

And don't worry about the bug. He's not leaving town. We got his ship.