Year:
2001 – 2010
Tagline:
«I'm No Superman»
Country:
USA
Genres:
Drama, Comedy
In the unreal world of Sacred Heart Hospital, intern John "J.D." Dorian learns the ways of medicine, friendship and life.
— See, this stuff has become so mundane to me that I've created a character who's terrified about going back to prison. And through him, I hope to feel, once again, the old rush.
— You carry on.
— Good. 'Cause I can't go back there, man. Not after what they did to Johnny. Oh, Johnny. He was the best. I wish you'd known him. Those guards worked him over good. They shanked him with a shiv. And they shivved him with a shank. Over a pack of smokes. Johnny, you were too beautiful for this world, man.
— Hey, have you ever been in love before?
— Once. She was a janitor. Well, for her, the mop always came first, you know? And that was fine, until one day I come home from work early and there they are in bed. They were just cuddling, but still, you know. It was really the emotional betrayal that makes it hard to talk about. But you've changed all of that for me.
— Listen, if he wanted to find a place to hide your patient, he could. He's just stressed and out of his elements, and, hell, he's scared. And even if he hasn't realized it, this job is changing him already, because it comes with a whole host of overwhelming responsibilities, including keeping this hospital afloat.
— I'd help him if he'd let me, but you know he won't.
— When I was Chief, if Dr. Cox came to me and complained about something I would automatically say «no». And if he never complained again, I'd know it wasn't that important. But if he came back and fought for it over and over, I knew it was something that I'd have to take a look at. Now he's me, and he's got this damn voice in his head telling him to say «no» all the time. And he desperately needs someone on the other side to tell him what he should do, whether he wants to hear it or not. And now, that person is you. Here we are.
— Will he at least be grateful?
— No. He's gonna hate you for it.
Still, sometimes when you make big decisions, life starts going so fast that it seems like you're not even moving throught it. It just happens to you.
— Why aren't you taking the job, Perry?
— You said it was a bureaucratic nightmare. And I don't want to be miserable.
— You love being miserable.
— I don't want everyone to hate me.
— Everybody already hates you. You wanna know the real reason why you don't want the gig, champ? Because you're a fraidy-cat.
— Beg your pardon?
— Didn't you hear me? Are fraidy-cat's ears too tiny?
— Don't push me, Bob.
— You're right. I'm sorry. Would it make you feel any better to bat this around for a while?
— You're too hard on yourself.
— No, I'm not. I'm just stupid and ugly and I have a pig face.
Look, Tammy, we don't have the money. If you want to go out and raise the cash yourself, feel free. Maybe you could sell your eggs to a fertility clinic, or sell that beard of yours to the Ridiculous Museum. Better yet, you could make a list of all the people that you drive insane, and tell them that, for a nominal fee, you'll never speak to them again. You, of course, offer them a monthly subscription at a reduced rate just to reel them in, and then after a while of you not talking to them, people will forget just how annoying you are, and they'll let their subscription run out and, bang, that's when you show up at their house, and you drive them insane all over again by speaking to them. And here's the kicker, when everyone's trying to re-subscribe, you lay it on them that the price is now quadruple! And I'm predicting, and this is a low-end guesstimate, you're looking at about $ 100 million a quarter, easy.
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