Bob Kelso – Character Quotes

40 quotes
 Bob Kelso

Robert "Bob" Kelso, M. D., is a fictional character played by Ken Jenkins in the American comedy-drama Scrubs.

Bob Kelso is the chief of medicine for Sacred Heart Hospital for the first seven seasons of Scrubs (a position held since 1984), though he resigns in the episode "My Dumb Luck". Kelso appeared in every episode during the first eight seasons except three Season 8 episodes, "My Last Words", "Their Story II" and "My Full Moon".

Jenkins was a regular cast member for the first eight seasons, and appeared in nine episodes of season nine.

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Over 50 per cent of our lawsuits can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication. To that end, if any of you still feel the need to flap your babble holes, you will be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations. My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I overheard telling someone, «Stop bleeding, oh, God, please stop bleeding».

Over 50 per cent of our lawsuits can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication. To that end, if any of you still feel the need to flap your babble holes, you will be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations. My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I overheard telling someone, «Stop bleeding, oh, God, please stop bleeding».
Over 50 per cent of our lawsuits can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication. To that end, if any of you still feel the need to flap your babble holes, you will be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations. My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I overheard telling someone, «Stop bleeding, oh, God, please stop bleeding».
Over 50 per cent of our lawsuits can be traced back to poor patient-doctor communication. To that end, if any of you still feel the need to flap your babble holes, you will be joining me in my new daily seminar on doctor-patient relations. My first invitee will be Dr Murphy, whom I overheard telling someone, «Stop bleeding, oh, God, please stop bleeding».
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— So, how are my girls today? Fantastic. Listen...
— If you're here to do one of your "How are my girls today, now let me tell you some things you don't want to hear" routines, I'm in a mood, so it's probably in your best interes to make up some lame excuse and leave.
— Young lady, I will not be spoken to like that. Luckily for you, I have to go see Miss Fitzstrafoler.

- So, how are my girls today? Fantastic. Listen...
- If you're here to do one of your "How are my girls today, now let me tell you some things you don't want to hear" routines, I'm in a mood, so it's probably in your best interes to make up some lame excuse and leave.
- Young lady, I will not be spoken to like that. Luckily for you, I have to go see Miss Fitzstrafoler.
- So, how are my girls today? Fantastic. Listen...
- If you're here to do one of your "How are my girls today, now let me tell you some things you don't want to hear" routines, I'm in a mood, so it's probably in your best interes to make up some lame excuse and leave.
- Young lady, I will not be spoken to like that. Luckily for you, I have to go see Miss Fitzstrafoler.
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— And this abomination is the reason we can't afford a new computer?
— Well, that... and the medical boondoggle I have to go to in Cleveland. And by medical boondoggle, I mean golf weekend, and by Cleveland, I mean Hawaii. <...> Anyway, I have to go catch my bus to the airport. And by bus, I mean helicopter.

- And this abomination is the reason we can't afford a new computer?
- Well, that... and the medical boondoggle I have to go to in Cleveland. And by medical boondoggle, I mean golf weekend, and by Cleveland, I mean Hawaii. <...> Anyway, I have to go catch my bus to the airport. And by bus, I mean helicopter.
- And this abomination is the reason we can't afford a new computer?
- Well, that... and the medical boondoggle I have to go to in Cleveland. And by medical boondoggle, I mean golf weekend, and by Cleveland, I mean Hawaii. <...> Anyway, I have to go catch my bus to the airport. And by bus, I mean helicopter.
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— Tell him my most important rule, Ted.
— Too much ''ha-ha'', pretty soon ''boo-hoo''.
— My other rule.
— If you don't look for a mistake, you can't find one.
— That's right, Teddy bear. Now, stop looking for trouble just because you like this patient, and face the facts. Remove him, Ted.
— That ''ha-ha'' rule is true.

- Tell him my most important rule, Ted.
- Too much ''ha-ha'', pretty soon ''boo-hoo''.
- My other rule.
- If you don't look for a mistake, you can't find one.
- That's right, Teddy bear. Now, stop looking for trouble just because you like this patient, and face the facts. Remove him, Ted.
- That ''ha-ha'' rule is true.
- Tell him my most important rule, Ted.
- Too much ''ha-ha'', pretty soon ''boo-hoo''.
- My other rule.
- If you don't look for a mistake, you can't find one.
- That's right, Teddy bear. Now, stop looking for trouble just because you like this patient, and face the facts. Remove him, Ted.
- That ''ha-ha'' rule is true.
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