Martin Riggs – Character Quotes

— You know, we should hire Leo.
— Hire Leo?
— Hire him. He can follow Uncle Benny around.
— Benny'll see him.
— Yeah. He'll drive him nuts.
— Benny'll shoot him. Let's hire him.

— Hey, Rog? What's going on? Why are you lying to me? I. A. says you're on the take.
— I'm on the take?
— I think it's crazy too. But you're spending lots of money.
— You ever hear of Ebony Clark?
— Yeah. She writes those cheesy sex novels!
— Yeah, yeah, yeah.
— Are you boinking her?
— No, I'm not boinking Ebony Clark.
— Trish is Ebony Clark.
— Trish is Ebony... You are boinking her.
— Yeah, l'm boinking her.

— We're going to get bloody on this one.
— Are you really crazy? Or are you as good as you say you are?
— You're gonna have to trust me.

— Do you sleep with that thing?
— I would if I slept.

— You don't trust me at all, do you?
— I tell you what. You make it through tomorrow without killing anybody... especially me or yourself, then I'll start trusting you.
— Fair enough. <...> It's the only thing I was ever good at.

— This was a new car, Riggs.
— Well, it still is.

— Who is it?
— Police. Open up.
— How do I know that?
— After I shoot you, you can examine the bullet. Open up.

— We shouldn't do this!
— Come on, don't be a killjoy! We're back! You're black, I'm mad.

— First time in 20 years I get the bathroom to myself. No kids banging on the door. No wife asking me to hurry up. Just me and my new Saltwater Sportsman magazine!
— The one with the article on deep-sea fishing?
— So I'm reading about marlin fishing in the Gulf of Mexico... when I glanced over. [caption: «Boom. You're dead»]
— Oh, Jesus. Is that all? You scared the shit out of me.
— Scared the shit out of you?
— How long you been here?
— I've been here all night. My legs are so numb I don't know if I can...
— Don't move.
— I can't.

— Hey, Lorna.
— Yeah?
— Let's live to regret this, huh?

— Well, I knew you couldn't stop smoking.
— I'm smoking to take my mind off my dog-biscuit problem.
— What dog-biscuit problem?
— I've been chasing more cars lately... and, uh, when I try and lick my balls, I keep falling off the couch.

— I slept with Sergeant Cole.
— Sergeant Cole from Traffic?
— No, not Sergeant Cole from Traffic. Lorna. Sergeant Cole from Traffic's her uncle.

— Hold it right there, pal. Step up here, please.
— What did I do?
— Stand there. What'd you do? Jaywalking. I saw you. I have to cite you.
— Jaywalking? Oh, Jesus, come on.
— Can you handle this or should I radio for backup?