The Catcher in the Rye - J. D. Salinger

"What the hellya reading?" he said.
"Goddam book."
He shoved my book back with his hand so that he could see the name of it. "Any good?" he said.
"This sentence I'm reading is terrific." I can be quite sarcastic when I'm in the mood.

Mothers are all slightly insane.

“I'm not in the mood right now,” I said. I wasn't, either. You have to be in the mood for those things.

People always think something’s all true. I don’t give a damn, except that I get bored sometimes when people tell me to act my age. Sometimes I act a lot older than I am — I really do — but people never notice it. People never notice anything.

He was one of those bald guys that comb all their hair over from the side to cover up the baldness. I'd rather be bald than do that.

Jane was different. We'd get into a goddam movie or something, and right away we'd start holding hands, and we wouldn't quit till the movie was over. And without changing the position or making a big deal out of it. You never even worried, with Jane, whether your hand was sweaty or not. All you knew was, you were happy. You really were.

Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can.

I’m quite illiterate, but I read a lot.

What I really felt like, though, was committing suicide. I felt like jumping out the window. I probably would've done it, too, if I'd been sure somebody'd cover me up as soon as I landed. I didn't want a bunch of stupid rubbernecks looking at me when I was all gory.

I don't know if you've ever done it, but it's sort of hard to sit around waiting for somebody to say something when they're thinking and all.

I think that one of these days, you're going to have to find out where you want to go. And then you've got to start going there. But immediately. You can't afford to lose a minute. Not you.

I mean most girls are so dumb and all. After you neck them for a while, you can really watch them losing their brains.

Anyway, I'm sort of glad they've got the atomic bomb invented. If there's ever another war, I'm going to sit right the hell on top of it. I'll volunteer for it, I swear to God I will.

I used to think she was quite intelligent, in my stupidity. The reason I did was because she knew quite a lot about the theater and plays and literature and all that stuff. If somebody knows quite a lot about those things, it takes you quite a while to find out whether they're really stupid or not.

People are always ruining things for you.

You can't ever find a place that's nice and peaceful, because there isn't any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write «Fuck you» right under your nose. Try it sometime. I think, even, if I ever die, and they stick me in a cemetery, and I have a tombstone and all, it'll say «Holden Caulfield» on it, and then what year I was born and what year I died, and then right under that it'll say «Fuck you». I'm positive, in fact.