If you love fighting so much, then stop whining that you weren't killed. Never admit defeat and ask for a quick death! Die first, then admit defeat! If you are defeated but didn’t die, it just means you were lucky! At those times, think only about survival! Survive and think only about killing the one who failed to kill you!
The day may come when the courage of Man fails, when we forsake our friends and brake all bounds of fellowship. But it is not this day! An hour of wolves, and shattered shields, when the age of Men comes crashing down. But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear, on this good earth. I bid you stand! Man of the West!
The first to make a move wins.
You can't evade an attack outside of your awareness.
No wonder you can't do it, you acquiesce to defeat before you even begin.
Some battles are won with swords and spears, others with quills and ravens.