If you can fake sincerity, you can fake pretty much anything.
— How do you know you're right?
— I don't, I just find it hard to operate on the opposite assumption.
You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn't perfect.
— Ah! The husband described her as being unusually irritable recently.
— And?
— I didn't know it was possible for a woman to be unusually irritable.
— Be yourself: cold, uncaring, distant.
— Please, don't put me on a pedestal.
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