Katarina "Kat" Stratford – Character Quotes

Can I ask you a favor? Don't break my heart. Okay?

— I was told the spots aren't assigned!
— Oh, no, they are assigned...by Charles Darvin. So why don't you and your dinosaur head to the back with the rest of the extinct species?
— My dinosaur wanted to Jurassic park here.

— ... I may have overreacted a little when I kicked the trash can over on him.
— It's very noble of you to confess.
— Thank you. So he doesn't have detention?
— No. You have it with him.

— I'm not stupid. You went to a club, which means you have a fake ID.
— No, no, no. Stop, stop, stop. Get out of there!
— I'm not sure what amazes me more. The fact that you lied to Dad or that this ID is so good.

— Oh! Yearbook photo girl. Want a pick?
— Thanks, but I have plenty of shots of girls who desperately need attention from boys to prop up their self-esteem.

— I like a woman who has no idea what she's doing.
— I just need a crowbar, and when I find one, you may want to run.
— And I'll run slow, so you could catch me.

Don't worry, I won't bust you. I just had to get out of the lunchroom. Apparently it's no longer socially acceptable to chew with your mouth closed. What's your name? When you're a big-time artist, I wanna be able to say I knew you back in high school. Provided you're not in jail for vandalism.

— Why don't you try a car wash? I remember the summer before sophomore year...
— Something really boring happend. Awesome story, Dad.
— A car wash? I love it! Thanks, Daddy.
— Great idea, Dad. Half-naked cheerleaders, wet and soapy, standing on the street asking for money.
— No car wash.
— Daddy!

— I need you to show something.
— Careful. That's borderline sexual harassment.
— Oh, borderline? Clearly I'm not working hard enough. {He takes off his sweater} Same shirts.
— Wow! Two things that match. Pretty soon you'll be reading.

— What you did was dangerous. Very, very, very dangerous.
— I was going two miles an hour, not exactly the Fast and the Furious.

— So what happens tomorrow if you don't get a flower?
— I'll just go home sick... and never come back.

— I...use that data to carefully plot out our first encounter, so as to easily befriend and beguile her.
— Beguile? Big word, Shakespear.

— You drive me.
— No way, Miss Daisy.
— I'll tell Dad you're not a virgin.
— You have one hour.

— How do I look?
— Shallow.
— Thank you!

— You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
— Please, we're talking about teenagers. They're impressed by shiny objects.
— Thus my earings.

You know, Dad warns us every day about getting pregnant... Well, he never mentiones all the other ways a guy can screw you.