You know how people have these little habits that get you down? Like Bernie. Bernie liked to chew gum. No, not chew. Pop. So I came home this one day, and I'm really irritated... and I'm looking for a little bit of sympathy. There's Bernie lyin' on the couch... drinkin' a beer and chewin'. No, not chewin'. Poppin'! So I said to him, "You pop that gum one more time..." And he did. So I took the shotgun off the wall... and I fired two warning shots into his head.
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