— She's got a type, which is really anyone but you.
— Yeah, that was my ex-wife's type, too.
— Here are two pictures. One is your locker. The other is a garbage dump in the Philippines. Can you tell which is which?
— That one's the dump?
— They're both your locker.
— Ah, I should have guessed that. He's good.
He's so suave. Does anyone get a little bit of a gay vibe?
— Peralta. Brief us on the vandalism case.
— Well, there's no easy way to put this, Sarge. But someone has been painting wieners on squad cars. And apparently, they won't stop until there's a penis
drawn on every cop car in Brooklyn.
— Oh, that's what he's been drawing. But, what are those two little round things at the bottom?
— It's a butt.
— Come here. Ten-minute hug time.
— I’d rather not.
Didn't find your favorite quotes from Brooklyn Nine-Nine?
Feel free to add quote