I'm going to tell you something, there's two types of guys out there, the ones that hold your hand and the ones that fuck you.
— I lost my orgasm.
— In the cab?
The sense of power is such a turn on — maybe you’re on your knees, but you got him by the balls.
— I'm thirty-five!
— Oh, shut the fuck up, I'm a hundred and forty.
— Relationships aren't just about being happy. I mean, how often are you happy in your relationship?
— I'm pretty sure that's to you.
— Every day.
— You feel happy every day?
— Not all day every day, but yes, every day.
I feel the same way about being a bridesmaid as you feel about Botox. Painful and unnecessary.
— I can't believe that my life revolves around a man. On what planet did I allow that to happen?
— But you love him.
— Does that mean saying his name 50 times more a day than I say my own? Does it mean worrying about him and his needs before me and mine? Is it all about the other person? Is that love?
— No, that's marriage.