Dating is stressful. But being alone is worse.
Nobody likes dating. It's awkward and uncomfortable. It's expensive.
— What can I do for you, ma'am?
— I would like some water, if it's no trouble.
— Water? That word is poison around these parts ever since the days of the great flood.
— You mean you never wash?
— We sure do!
— I'd like to use the same facilities you people do.
— You sure can. Just happen to have a full tub at the back. You're lucky. Only three people have used it this morning.
— Used it one at a time or all together?
— Hey man where-where-where's your cup holder?
— I don't have one.
— What the f — w'you mean you don't have one? Eighty thousand dollars for this car and you ain't got no damn cup holder?
— It's $105,000 and this happens to be one of the fastest production cars on the planet. Zero to sixty in four seconds, sweetie. It's a limited edition.
— You damn right it's limited. No cup holder, no back seat. Just a shiny dick with two chairs in it. I guess we the balls just draggin' the fuck along.