I figured if the Marines wanted me to have a wife, they'd have issued me one.
God has a hard-on for marines because we kill everything we see! He plays His games, we play ours! To show our appreciation for
so much power, we keep heaven packed with fresh souls! God was here before the Marine Corps! So you can give your heart to Jesus, but your ass belongs to the Corps! Do you ladies understand?
Four types of people join the military. First, for people like me, it's a family trade. Second, there are patriots, eager to serve their country. Third, there are people who just need a job. And fourth, there are people who want to kill other people. The military is the only place where it's legal to do that.
Anyone who runs is a V. C. Anyone who stands still is a well-disciplined V. C.
— Why should we do a story about you?
— 'Cause I'm so fucking good! That ain't no shit neither. I've done got me one hundred and fifty-seven dead gooks killed. And fifty water buffaloes, too. Them're all certified.
— Any women or children?
— Sometimes.
— How can you shoot women and children?
— Easy. You just don't lead 'em so much.
My husband’s in the Army, which means we all are.
— General, are you tryin' to tell me in all this man's military... there is no room left for a trained weapon of destruction?
— The fighting is no longer done on the battlefields, Payne. Now all the blood is shed in the halls of Congress. Boys like us are becoming dinosaurs.
— There gotta be somebody need some killin'.
— I'm sorry, Major, there's no one left. You've killed 'em all.
As a grunt in the Army of Red Mist, Mogul Khan set his sights on the rank of Red Mist General. In battle after battle he proved his worth through gory deed. His rise through the ranks was helped by the fact that he never hesitated to decapitate a superior. Through the seven year Campaign of the Thousand Tarns, he distinguished himself in glorious carnage, his star of fame shining ever brighter, while the number of comrades in arms steadily dwindled. On the night of ultimate victory, Axe declared himself the new Red Mist General, and took on the ultimate title of 'Axe.' But his troops now numbered zero. Of course, many had died in battle, but a significant number had also fallen to Axe's blade. Needless to say, most soldiers now shun his leadership. But this matters not a whit to Axe, who knows that a one-man army is by far the best.