Armageddon – Movie Quotes

— You tell me, that these eight Boy Scouts right here, that is the world's hope, that's what you're tellin' me?
— Yeah.
— Oh, Jesus! Damn it!

God, I hate knowing everything.

American components, Russian Components... All made in Taiwan!

— The person that finds her gets to name her, right?
— Yes, that's right. That's right.
— l want to name her Dottie, after my wife. She's a vicious, life-suckin' bitch from which there's no escape.

And here we are. The fate of the planet is in the hands... of a bunch of retards l wouldn't trust with a potato gun.

— Get off... the nuclear... warhead.
<...>
— Just wanted to feel the power between my legs, brother.

Ah, Chick, l ain't gonna kill him. Just gonna take a foot off. A man can work with one foot. You remember old Frank Marx who worked with one hand all them years?

— It's not going to Mars anymore. It's gonna try to save this planet. And we need to know what's wrong with it pretty quick. You said we did a bad job of putting it together?
— No, I said you did a pisspoor job of putting it together.

— What's up, Harry? Did NASA find oil on Uranus, man?
<...>
— The United States government just asked us to save the world. Anybody wanna say no?
<...>
— l don't mean to be the materialistic weasel of this group, but... you think we'll get hazard pay out of this?

— Tell me you've never let anybody down before.
— I never quit yet. How's that?
— I guess that'll have to do.

— But it's gonna make you queasy, so prepare yourself.
— Well, it's about time. l haven't thrown up in about an hour.

— It's an asteroid, sir.
— How big are we talking?
— It's the size of Texas, Mr. President.
— Dan, we didn't see this thing coming?
— Well, our object collision budget's a million dollars. That allows us to track about three percent of the sky. And begging your pardon, sir, it's a big-ass sky.
<...>
— Is this... going to hit us?
— We're efforting that as we speak, sir.
— What kind of damage are we...
— Damage? Total, sir.

— Baby, do you think it's possible that anyone else in the world is doing this very same thing at this very same moment?
— I hope so. Otherwise, what the hell are we tryin' to save?

— Harry, this is illegal, man.
— l'm temporarily insane, Rock. lt's all right.

Yeah, one more thing, um...none of them wanna pay taxes again. Ever.

— Hi, honey. Grace, I know I promised you I was comin' home.
— I don't under... Understand.
— Looks like I'm gonna have to break that promise.
— I, um... I lied to you, too, when I told you that I didn't want to be like you. Because I am like you. And everything good that I have inside of me, I have from you. I love you so much, Daddy. I'm so proud of you. I'm so scared. I'm so scared.
— I know it, baby. But there won't be anything to be scared of soon. Gracie, I want you to know that A. J. saved us. He did. I want you to tell Chick that I couldn't have done it without him. None of it. I want you to take care of A. J. I wish I could be there to walk you down the aisle. But I'll... I'll look in on you from time to time, okay, honey? I love you, Grace.
— I love you, too.