Equally important will find nice sensible boyfriend to go out with and not continue to form romantic attachments to any of the following alcoholics, workaholics, commitment-phobics, peepingtoms, megalomaniacs, emotional fuck wits, or perverts. And especially will not fantasize about a particular person who embodies all this things.
— How do you know Arsey Darcy?
— Apparently, I used to run around naked in his paddling pool.
— I bet you did, you dirty bitch.
— What about you?
— Same.
Well, I better dash. I've got another party to get to. Loads of single people. Mainly poofs. Bye.
I suddenly realized that unless something changed soon I was going to live a life where my major relationship was with a bottle of wine, and I'd finally die fat and alone and be found three weeks later half-eaten by Alsatians.
Mr. Fitzherbert — Tits Pervert, more like, who staays freely at my breasts with no idea who I am. <...> Perpetua — slightly senior and therefore she's in charge of me. most of the time I just want to staple things to her head. <...> Daily call from Jude. Best friend. Head of investment at Brightlings Bank who spends most of her time trapped in the lady's toilet, crying over fuck wit boyfriend. <...> Shazzer — journalist. Likes to say "fuck" a lot. <...> Tom — Eighties pop icon who only wrote one hit record and then retired because he found that one record was quite enough to get him laid for the whole of the Nineties.
Bridget learns that Daniel Cleaver is engaged to Lara from the New York office.
— Daniel, that thing you just did is actually illegal in several countries.
— Well, that is, of course, the major reason I'm so thrilled to be living in Britain today.
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